all about the base #SinfulSunday

once again sunday is brought to you by the letter S for sin

and the number “awesome”

wait?

what do you mean “awesome” isn’t a number

fine

be that way

click on the lips to show who else is being sinful this sunday

like, share and comment your heart out folks

now… on to my post

…

i have been staying with TinMan this week

he was hurt on the job and can’t drive

so i have been nursing the poor boy to health

granted sex has also been on the healing menu

and it should go without saying that we need to pay more attention to the shutters being closed vs seeming to be closed

it is very likely that someone watched a very naught exchange while i was practicing my oral skills

but today was slightly more innocent

he was playing fallout 4 while i was fucking around on facebook

i was sprawled out on his bed

wearing a tank top and panties

teasing the boys online

as one does

and when he was done gaming

i had him snap a shot for you lovely lot

i hope you like my ass

normal “granny” panties

will go for lace later

maybe nothing at all

he has a great shower

oh and at some point over the next few days i simply MUST show off my new strapon i bought from Sh! in Hoxton, London

so many stories to share and pics to make

love you fine fuckers

happy holidays

and remember to keep inspiring me to write and take pics

i need it

 

book time #SinfulSunday

i like the cold better

it is easier to warm up and relax

tonight i was cold but after getting comfy in my robe and fuzzy socks

i discovered the blankets were too much

slowly stripping as i read my chapters

more than one person this week had requested i tease the camera

hint but not show

i almost always show my top

but rarely my bottom

hope your sunday has had some sin

that your monday start on the right side of the bed

remember to check out who else is being sinful

leave comments and retweet

too emo to post on #SinfulSunday :(

just been too emotional

too depressed

not sad, i stop myself from feeling that as much as possible

mostly feeling overwhelmed

no safe zone

in need of aftercare without any of the bdsm pleasure

feeling very much like the universe is using me for hardcore sm challenge

i want the fun, the pleasure, the normal struggles in life

just too overwhelmed

got to spend time with TinMan yesterday

that helped and that hurt

so easy to slip into the past and hate my ex husband for stealing my life

each day i have to fight the depression that says i should be in a partnership

that my bed shouldnt be half empty

that my house shouldnt be so caotic

that my life shouldnt be so stressed

that my eldest shouldnt yell at me, saying he isnt my boyfriend… there by meaning he feels he shouldnt have so many responsibilities

i want less stress and more cooperation

more fun, less mental abuse

my son is now 18

i have been treating him like an adult for the last year

trying to train him what the real world is like

he sees me as a petty tyrant

is incapable of helping

i am his maid, his slave… cinderella with no dress, no ball, no prince charming and no fairy godmother

but i am the problem (in his eyes)

people tell me i need a vacation

that wont help

i need control over my life

but i cant seem to get that

every time i come close something comes along and cuts me down

i’m tired of being strong

i’m tired of getting abuse when trying to do my job as a mom

i’m tired of the fighting

i’m tired of being alone… as in having a wealth of friends i never to rarely see, who live their lives without me

i am tired of reminding myself not to be jealous of the happiness of others

i’m tired of people saying i need a shrink when what i NEED is a job, steady income, improved health, less stress, more friends nearby, normalcy and better language skills to cope with living in a different country

tired of not being me

i want to laugh, go to parties, host parties, go camping, go to the movies, go out for drinks, go to music events

i want a garden with beautiful plants and to have people over for a bbq

so tired of having no interest in anything because i cant afford to spend energy on wishing for what i want and knowing i wont have it

i dont want to be strong any more

i want someone to help take the weight of the world off my shoulders because i keep trying to put it down, the stuff i shouldnt be carrying but it seems magnetized and flies right back at me

feeling so lost

ok i have cried

i have vented my soul

time to go back and be strong

be what everyone seems to think i am

so here

a pic for you to oo and ah over

forgetting my words and emo crap

cant go wrong with toes, sole, nipple and rounded nipples

hope your monday is less emotionally charged than mine

Toes Water …lost in la la land

ok i wasnt really lost

but it is france so i can still get away with calling it la la land haha

i am still in pain

horrible migraine but it is fading

only 2.5 days

so i am trying to show off the beautiful area that my son showed me

he is often getting lost on his bike rides and later comes home

“omg i found this beautiful place to catch salamanders”

or

“there is this amazing cave and area where they used to wash laundry in the old days”

and many similar things

the weekend was lovely towards the end and i had enough energy

so we went for a walk

i was in the wrong shoes but who cares

we both had cameras and snapped many pictures

the turn around point was the cave and laundry stream

i sat for a bit and splashed my toes in the water

the air was warm

sun was golden through the trees

and the water was chilly but perfect

and then i had to dry my feet

put on my shoes

and walk back to the car

so here are my pictures

magnolia

i love these trees

the cave where the water comes from

and the area where i sat to dip my toes in the water

the migraines stopped me from doing more this week

but hopefully i will see shooting stars tonight

health, a #SundayResolution

i have been thinking
everyone makes new years resolutions and then give up after a few seconds or maybe months
but when i think about what they are doing…
it doesn’t fit with me

i have noticed that people treat new years resolutions like lent
i must give up something and become a better person for losing this sin

i don’t want to give things up
i do that all the time
i constantly try to get rid of the negative in my life and be cheerful
if you read my posts on facebook you might say the opposite
but my life is full of struggle and pain
so facebook is my venting space
but overall i really am a very happy person
more so considering all the shit i live with on a daily basis

since i am not religious… but i understand the concepts in various religions and philosophies..
i don’t do “lent”…
and i wont give up things like energy drinks and chocolate for the new year

i want to ADD things into my life

i always TRY to eat healthy and i always want to exercise more
but those are not things i will do simply because it is the new year

so i have been looking at the various lists out there
what people think are important to do in a resolution

one said read more
and i like that idea because that falls into the category of being good to myself
setting up a calm space for me, a nice drink of some kind, comfy pillows and background music
just relaxing with a book

now i do read a lot of sci fi but i should be reading more smutt
i have so many friends who write erotica and i should be devoting more time to their words
that is what a good friend does and i would like to be a good friend

i decided
my new years resolution is complicated
and since i want to blog more and take more pictures
i will do like molly from Molly’s Daily Kiss

she and others are often participating in Memes that mix photography and ideas
i loved her advent calendar of pictures with the alphabet theme
and there have been others she has done… as you can tell she is an inspiration for me

what i want to do is be realistic
i am lazy due to so much stress in my life
i know i cant post every sunday but i try for the #SinfulSunday meme

i had the idea to count how many sundays there are, per month, in 2015
most have 4 but some have 5
if i stick with the idea of the once a month theme for sinful sunday that removes one sunday per month from the list of resolutions

if i take off the 4 extra sundays throughout the year where there are a total of 5 sundays in a month…
and if i take off one more sunday per month…

well roughly that means i will keep trying to post the themed sinful sunday and 2 more sundays per month
i think i can do 3 sundays a month in total for posting blogs and pictures
it is a small goal but it is something i want to do

so each sunday blog entry will be my personal theme and interpretation of one of my new years resolutions

today i start with health…
drinking hot coffee with milk, vanilla extract, unrefined brown sugar (when unrefined there are lots of health benefits) and coconut oil (needed for my various health issues)

and as you can see, i am also nude and slow to leave my bed
but i was a good girl and MADE my bed hahaha