I am not a pretty princess

So I felt playful the other day and posted this picture

I don’t do pink

Yet I felt the need to be cute and silly

Sadly I’m not the badass type to dye my hair all sorts of colors and wear outlandish amounts of bright makeup

Though I’m highly curious due to so many of my friends who live this type of lifestyle

But I’d rather be a pirate wench haha

Guess I’ll have to break out my corsets soon

trying something new #destiny

ok so my boys have been raving about how much the love the game destiny

i hear the 18yr old at all hours of the night goofing off with friends around the world

he tells me the silly shit they talk about and in a way it makes me jealous

see i used to be a gamer girl

but i lost that during the marriage

slowly going more and more into a hermit shell

i used to be on different forums, joking around and part of groups

i miss it

sure most of us migrated to facebook and still shoot the shit on a daily basis with snarky comments

of course i am often the one inspiring sexual havoc in my words

someone needs to be the weirdo lol

as i pause my writing

my lap has been invaded by a certain lil kitten demanding pettings


after a long time of hearing my boys rage and rant and giggle over this game i picked up a copy for myself

i want in

i dont do well on 1st person games or shooting anything but a bow or my mouth

i’m more of a dreamer, looking for a good story and monster bashing

i got zelda for the wii a few years back and i was doing a peepee style dance as i had to keep pressing the button to get past all the damn talking and there i was just wanting to hack n slash

ah well, live and learn

so it seems sony is down for maintenance so i am hozed for trying anything tonight, i know it takes ages to start the game but now i have a longer wait

but i am gonna do this

new year, new start, new shit and find the old me i liked to bring her back to the front where i am now








adventures in teen cooking

so i was away all week, my 18yr old was home alone and decided he wanted to make rock candy

he failed and told me about it when i came home
i was not surprised by the sink full of dishes
he did warn me that the blue in the sink was from him trying to make rock candy

ok no biggy
i thought blue dye in large or small stains

but no

i start sorting the dishes to wash and dumping the contents, when i come to a bowl i thought was full of blue dye and water

no it had his mix in it and the stuff ooooozed out

i was grossed out and giggling madly, almost in tears

now i know what smurf jizz looks like

i hate this time of year ..mini rant

i hate this time of year
i have a house that is still a mess because i dont have enough storage units to store shit
virtually no furniture
probly not going to afford much for the kids for the holidays
probly wont get paid for the food they eat while the stay with me the first half of the holidays
right now, all i really want is the house to be warm, clean and some simple decorations to bring back the magic they havent been getting in the 6yrs we have been here
i hate this time of year
i am over budget on everything
i wash my dishes by hand because i dont have a machine..i spend hours at the sink and it is depressing
i have no washing machine and spend about 50€ a month doing laundry at the laundry box nearby… more hours of my life gone
i bought material to make curtains so i can keep the heat out but i still have to finish the edging and buy things to hang them
i have to fix my car… god only knows what they will tell me, might end up needing 800 or more in repairs if they get looking for reasons to take my money
i need the cd player deblocked and the driverside chair deblocked..hope i dont need new tires AGAIN.. i have to get it checked for that thing you do.. cant remember the name in english or french but that thing for making it road legal cause that is coming up next month
it is sluggish..does that mean new spark plugs or something? i dont know cars
my cat and the neighbors cat are trying to piss in my plants… inside plants…
neighbor was a drunk fuck, he smashed up his car on the new road hump that was installed with all the other lovely changes to the little town i live in… he fucked up a lot of shit and each airbag deployed and front window has long cracks and there was oil allll over… same neighbor that has no problem trying to molest me or tries to get too close to the other two female neighbors (one younger than me, one older)… seems karma is going to be one cruel bitch to him
hope he leaves us alone, i dont need his bs
unemployment people look at me and say “but you dont look sick” and want me working 35 hours a week
i havent worked in 6.5 years and the year before that i was either pregnant or on maternity leave… so make it i havent worked part time or full time in at least 7.5 years
there is no way i can cope with that many hours, my health is way better but …i need more sleep than most, i need a fucking dishwasher and washing machine or i cant work..yay catch 22
doesnt help that they want me working as a secretary..in the uk or the states i could but no fucking way in france! just no way… it is too complicated!
and it doesnt help that my son goes to school 35 min north of where i live, the unemployment people want me visiting their location or working near them which is 25-30 min east of where i live and over an hour from my son… he has issues too and i cant be that far from him!
no one is listening to me
they hear what they want and do what they think i need
i dont get the right paperwork! i am made to look like some crazy fool that is overly paranoid! even my paranoia is justified when they keep fucking me over!
the people who are empathetic to my situation cant help
the ones who can help dont give a fuck and fail to see why i am so upset
i am fighting so many small battles and big wars
i dont want a shrink..
i want fun
i want a life
i want the small things
the simple things
i want friends that are closer to me than (min 35 min and i have to drive cause they dont) over 2hours away
i want a girls night out..whatever that means…i wouldnt know cause i dont do that
i want to go to the movies
i want the normal small shit that people take forgranted
i want the OPTION to do my nails and pamper myself…i just want that option
i want to stop “coping” ..stop existing..i want to live and have a life
i want to give that to my kids
i dont understand why everything has always been so damn complicated
yes, i know, there are others who have it worse
but i am not them
my pain and fears and frustrations are valid!
i hate this time of year
it reminds me how worthless i feel every day and try to for get that
i know it is bs..part of the damage applied to me, the traumas of being a victim vs getting past all that bs and being a survivor ..aka trying to be/look normal
fuck i hate this time of year
and too much to do …so cant keep whining…have to go bitch at people for being retarded…again!

Ninja Attack! ….another laundry day

there will be more to this story but i have to tease you a bit first

ninjas are real!

one rushed me as it threw a shoe and men’s (wet but clean) under garments at me!

the door to the dryer simply BURST open and things of all kinds rushed at me

i tell you! Ninjas are real! i being a pirate wench know when i am being attacked! 😉

all i can say is… i stuffed those naughty men things and that shoe into the dryer before more could escape to get me!

i think i might have even let out a southern/creole style “GET BACK IN DERE!” as i tried to force the door closed enough to not be further menaced by such an evil Ninja

also having to shout “OI!!! Monsieur Monsieur!” and getting him to understand that the Ninjas were escaping!!

i think he thought i was mad but really… if you are a writer of ANYTHING sexual, let alone a blog of the naughty sort… well then it fits that men’s underwear throw themselves at you…in a ninja way of course

and yes i gave this male from the handball team the link to my blog

not that it will do him much good as i dont write in french …lol …opps ..lol-again

so this was just a small part of my day, i will come back and share more… even more from the laundry but also the rest of my mad world


BED TIME…am a bit brain dead…need sleep or coffee and the coffee is downstairs

E.B. Starpointer

erotic author and sex-positive male commentator

An Accident In Space And Time

Just your average, friendly Vulcan

Exposed Loving

Be Love. Bring Love. LOVE.

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