Down by 30


So I’ve lost “some” weight since last year

I was 92kilo / 202.8lbs

Now I’m 78kilo / 171.96lbs

Still a long way to go but it’s fantastic to see results

I find it funny

First thing the average person says to me when I quote my numbers… 

“Just not in the boobs I hope!!”

So no

I still have my boobs hahahaha

#sinfulsunday back in black


Hey!
I’m back!!!

Going to try posting again and do so on a semi regular basis

It’s been a year and much has happened since I moved into the new (rental) house last year

I’ve been able to move more and I’ve lost 14 kilo/ 31lbs and trying to keep this going!!

The title “back in black” is a bit of a joke in that the two pictures I’m posting for sinful Sunday are a lil silly

I posted an edited version on Facebook and Instagram to get people aware that I’m trying to be me and post more

But with all the “omg no nipple!!” Rules on Facebook, I added the black bar with “sorry….. NSFW”

It was a great tease hehe

Now to show the original picture
It’s been very hot in France and I spent a number of days in just a bathing suit… I figured I would take some pictures

Hope you have a great weekend

Remember that sinful Sunday is all about the image and to check the others participating… We like positive feedback and sharing

Click on the lips to see who else is adding their blog

Sinful Sunday

summer healing


so i have been battling an autoimmune disorder for nearly 25 years and i will be 37 this october… so my health has been something of a mess for FAR too long

one of the best ways to see how i am suffering is to look at my face

part of the reason i tend to look so young is because i have something similar to acne and have had this problem since i was 10!

it seems that i am allergic to myself and have random allergy breakouts that get worse depending on a number of factors

since moving out of that pretty shit hole i was in for 3 years.. my skin is healing

i moved out fully in july, so far i have only had one bad week of skin where i needed some make up to dampen down the look of my skin

because i get cysts in some of my pores, i literally have to perform surgery on my face to get the crap out or it will hurt worse and force me to go to the hospital to get them to do it under pain meds… the cysts tend to reach down and put pressure on nerves making it excruciating the bigger they get

but taking care of my skin constantly makes he have sores that run the risk of getting infected and leaving angry red spots or scars… it is a real bitch and can be a nightmare to hear or see people freak out if i am not wearing makeup

being out of the bad house with the mold has really helped my health

on top of that i started to use a mixture of coconut oil and red palm oil, rubbing it into my skin and sleeping with it on over night

i have no allergies to either but if you try it be warned of possible allergies and staining of towels or sheets haha

first time i tried i worried if the orange tint would wash off my face.. did not want to go around with people thinking i wanted to look like trump.. ick ick lol

but it comes off easily and heals the skin, making it softer, cutting down infection and bacteria that builds up on and in the skin… also helps to slowly make scars go away πŸ˜€

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so this is me today, no makeup and this is the end of a week were it has been the worst my skin has looked in a about a month and a half πŸ˜€

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this is me the other day with makeup

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haha no eyebrows but who cares

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i love that i am healing… finally

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also love that i am starting to slim down, i’ve lost 7 kilos, roughly 15 lbs… im at 85 kilo or roughly 187lbs

haha no i dont plan on trying to get stick skinny, my bones and muscle tone would never support that but i would like to get closer to 56kilo or roughly 125 lbs where i was about 10 years ago

i love this picture as it clearly shows more of my lines are coming back as i slim down

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less weight means easier to move, easier to find clothing that fits in this weird fashion world of france and elf like bodies… i’m more of a dwarf haha but no beard πŸ˜‰

i want to be stronger and more healthy

 

 

too depressed to post… sorry


i hate this time of year

i try so hard to stay positive and push the pain away but depression always sneaks up and gets me

no money

living in a house that keeps me depressed and unable to get a job or get my life organized

can’t get a better house that is the size i need because no job

people want to put me in a smaller house to fit the money the government gives me

but smaller means more of my things have to go in storage

i already have a storage unit at almost 200 a month

how is putting me in a smaller house better if i have to rent more storage units to house my things and where do i put my boys when they are with me?

am i supposed to have them sleep in the fucking car?

how am i supposed to get ahead if i keep getting screwed over by people who havent got a clue

how am i supposed to see my kids if they keep putting my in places further away and it isnt fair that my mentally and emotionally abusive husband has my kids! MY KIDS!!! only one of the 3 is his by blood and the fuck nut told me to abort when i was pregnant

how the fuck am i supposed to be strong when i keep getting screwed over

….

so if you want sexy pics… fuck you… i do this blog for me

not for you

if you are one of the people that message me telling me how sexy i am and what fucking we would do if closer and blah blah blah

you are part of the problem too

i don’t have a sex life

i have a “i get used” life

i don’t feel anything sexual, my nerves are fucked and i don’t feel any of those happy tingles in the sexual nerves… they are dead or damaged

sex is boring for me

i get nothing from it

and i fucking tell people this all the god damn time but they don’t get it and they keep trying to get me to turn them on and make them cum and make THEM HAPPY

i don’t like getting used

so if you are one of the users… either fuck off or fucking pay me for your bullshit

i am too depressed to deal with the shit of others

i have too many problems and everyone who says they are helping me are actually not

i am alone

i have no friends i can count on when i need them

i only have a few nice people in my life and even them… they gain more from me than i do

so i am done

no more boyfriends, lovers, what not

i’m just me and fuck it all

if i’m going to be lonely and alone i might as well avoid getting screwed over and used too

so sorry if no sexy pics for the hoildays like i wanted

too many idiots in my life making me miserable and then being told it’s my fault i am unhappy… i don’t need that shit

 

 

 

sniffles and coughs… blah i’m sick


oh the sniffles

uggg the sneezes

poor me with the blahs

feeling so high with this cold

no drugs yet

had the drinks yesterday

day before too

mmmm grog is tasty

so… umm… like

anyone wanna send me a care package that has a cuddly cute person to pamper me with warm soup and cuddles

massage would be nice

better in the shower (no tub *sad shalla is sad*)

oh well

maybe next time

gonna take a nap and try to get better

have so much silliness and sex to blog about but can’t function when sick with the sniffles and cough and and and…stupid strep

brain is melted right now

E.B. Starpointer

erotic author and sex-positive male commentator

An Accident In Space And Time

Just your average, friendly Vulcan

Exposed Loving

Be Love. Bring Love. LOVE.

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