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  • shalla

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Female gamer… Sort of


While I no longer have 17 cats in the house…

The ones I do have seem to …umm… Be full of personality

Turtle is often in my son’s room when he games

I guess it’s her turn at the controls

#Hรคagen-Daz humor rant/plea ๐Ÿ˜‚


Yes I’m a bit mental

I fully admit that my humor is warped, twisted, sometimes dark and often not appropriate for the situation…. Any situation

I also admit that my body is often under caffeinated and if I’m on sleep dep… Things can get wonky right damn quick

So I’m scrolling, scrolling, scrolling…. Keep them pages rolling…. No no wait this isn’t rawhide…

So I’m going through Facebook to check what I missed during my few hours of sleep and the extra hours between coffee starting to kick in

I find this ad for Hรคagen-Daz and my humor kicks in

You see… France has ice cream

Not a huge selection though and all the companies seem to cover the same boring flavors

These flavors might be epicly fantastic but when you KNOW, FOR A FACT, that other flavors are out there… 

I might as well just eat vanilla

Preferably in what I coined “The Fat American”

Similar to a White/Black Russian in that it has vodka and coffee liquor but different as I do the following

Vodka, coffee liquor, caramel liquor, real coffee, milk and vanilla bean ice cream

It all gets blended (usually by spoon as I’m too lazy to want to wash more items that needed) into a sort of milkshake

I started calling it The Fat American because Russia already has two “similar” drinks and since it tastes better than anything I could get at a tarbucks…. Seemed appropriate

Also funny self depreciating humor since I’m an American in France and it fits with stereotypes associated with Americans ๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜‚

So, back to my point

I saw this on my timeline 

And the following is what I left in the public comments… 

Enjoy your trip into the madness that is my brain…

Dear Hรคagen-Dazs serving France

You are failing me….

I KNOW you have a number of flavors! I’ve been to your locations in the states and other parts of Europe

Why are you failing to stock my area with all the tasty good things?!!

What have I done to displease you!!

Come back to me

I promise I’ll behave!

Love me the way I love you

Let me count the ways and show my devotion!… Preferably by counting with different flavors as I consume them 

I’m a ginger and it’s not politically correct to steal souls any more!! I need an alternative!!

Sincerely…

Someone who should not be texting with so much blood in their caffeine system

Colors in my hair


So back in October I turned 38 and said FUCK IT!!

All my life people either made fun of my natural red hair (over time it’s faded due to health issues) and I’m not being honest about how badly I was treated for being a natural ginger … But this isn’t a therapy session ๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜‚

Or later I was told “don’t you dare color your hair”

While my mom would have allowed it, friends, lovers and random others always told me not to change the color

They said this to the point that with a few… It was more am order than an opinion

I’m nearly 40… Yes I have a few years to go but I’m closer to 40 than I am to 30 or 20

I’m tired of “behaving” according to others

I’ve done a number of other things, this blog included, that go against what society dictates as the norm

I missed the rebellion years for the most part and I missed a number of milestones that we seem to hold as high importance… Some are and many aren’t but either way I missed a number of them and I’m not likely to ever achieve any of them

Would you believe that I’ve never been to a concert?!! The Kennedy center for plays associated with school trips and local music festivals in Poitiers Where the streets are full of different performers

But it’s not the same

So… I’m done

This is MY life and MY body… Fuck those who tell me otherwise

So in October I had my friend dye the tips a dark red, she was visiting and runs around with the most gorgeous blue hair

I liked the red but decided I wanted more

So in November I added teal and purple to a section at the top

It’s temporary and that’s fine by me

The overall look makes me happy and changes depending on if my hair is fresh from the shower, straightened, up or down

So…

I was forced to go out today and do those dreaded things associated with being an adult… I had to people! 

Ewwwww!!!

PEOPLE!

It really takes a lot of energy to deal with others… Driving is bad enough!

Nearly got into two crashes in the parking lot of one store because… 

“Omg! You mean I have to watch where I’M going?!!!”

Or

“Like, I totally need to go down aisle 2 in the parking lot and it will be TOTALLY fine to hang a u’ie and go back the way I came”

Idiots… The lot of them

And you would think that folks would TRY to drive better when they KNOW the cops are right…fucking…THERE!

Cops had pulled over a semi and it was blocking most of the main road so one was playing traffic cop… It’s kinda hard NOT to notice them

But no…

Drivers are zombies

They leave their brains behind and drive in all manner of ways that make me want to thwap them

Thankfully I had few acts of road rage inside the store… You see the shopping carts in France are semi sentient beings that operate on 4 wheel drive

They go any which way and are still being pushed around by brainless zombies

My 20 yr old said if he became president, he’d make it mandatory for all ages to need a special driving permit to push a cart

At this rate… He’s got my vote!

So I ventured forth into the world

Battled the stupidity of others

And I found victory! 

Got all my chores done lol

So… I took a selfie to share my colored hair

Sadly they were out of purple… Kinda want it darker again ๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜‚

Hope your day was calmer than mine

Sorry for slacking NSFW pic


So I know I’ve been a bad girl about this blog

Life has gotten in the way, my desire to write kept fading and even my photography has suffered

Having 17 cats of various ages also kind of hammered my snarky and smutty ways

Happily I have fewer kittens now, took 6 ads over a period of 8 months and only the last ad generated any interest

Two more going soon and still trying to find homes for two or three after that

Hoping to be down to five or six cats, sadly there’s no chance to re-home two… Paprika is a right royal cunt, her daughter Turtle came back very bitchy after getting sterilized, her sister Kurry is mellowing out but also came back bitchy and Pauly technically isn’t ours

No way am I giving away Phantom Oreo, he’s mah boy and gives the best cuddles

So aside from the cats

Love life is complicated as ever but happy enough with the lovelies who care about me

Want to travel more but funds are low as ever lol

Would love to head to Ireland in March to see some friends and go bug the folks at i102104 … I miss being on the radio

If anyone is interested in helping to fund that, I’d be happy to exchange some pictures before and during my trip

The holidays were decent… Fewer panic attacks than any of the last 11 years

That time of year is always hard due to all the past loss (my middle son was a twin and seeing him can be hard since I miscarried his sibling right before Christmas and still hurts after 17 years), of family gone like all my grandparents and my father… Plus being poor and having a ton of cats meant absolutely no decorations lol

But I’ve been working on myself the last year and a half or so, mental health and physical… Always an adventure to stay sane due to politics and Facebook

I’ve lost about 40lbs and plan to keep sliming down and toning up

Since I absolutely had to be an adult today

I figured a few shower pictures to show the change in my body would be a good idea

I know how many pervy ones love any pics but I know how others see me as an inspiration for their own self love and whatever body type they have… Be it a weight issue (too much or too little), mental health issues (hard to stay sane when life keeps screwing with you) and my humor

I promise to try finding my wit and bringing it back to the blog vs hiding in Facebook and Instagram

Ok time to be productive


Hope you have a great day ๐Ÿ˜‰

E.B. Starpointer

erotic author and sex-positive male commentator

An Accident In Space And Time

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