Stuck in the mud

So when we bought the car it pitched slightly to the right but no biggy

Now… I could kick him for how it runs

Hubby decided a while back to start building a shed to park the car in

After getting the car he noticed his shed isn’t deep enough

No real big deal since it isn’t done yet

Key words there

Ok, all it is at the moment is a bit of frame work

Now that is a great start

Really it is

But its dirt ground still

And it’s been raining

For months

The car is heavy

I have had this weird aversion to parking there and didn’t really try to figure out why

I had just been leaving the car in another bit of open space, like the one in the picture of me with the car

Well he asks why I am not parking the car in the thing he made…

Didn’t have an answer, it just didn’t feel right so I wasn’t doing it

So to please him, I didn’t even bother thinking out the feeling I had, I just wanted to make him happy

I parked the car in his not finished shed

In the rain

With the wet ground

With a heavy car

Yeah next morning I get out to go to the oil change and… I can’t

Too much mud

I call him up bitching

Oh I was pissed! Half of it at myself for once again blindly trusting him and getting fucked over for it

I am still pissed off about the silverware I had in the states

He said I didn’t have to pack it, that his folks would help provide us with stuff

blah blah blah

ooooo the stupid fuck that I am, believed him and now have shit forks and what not that are falling apart cause of that plastic handle crap to be pretty and artistic….now have to invest in new cutlery when my old stuff was fine and heavy and none of it plastic…. gerrrrrr

So he gets pissed at me and asks if he should hang up because of the abuse I am slinging at him

Then asks if I want him to come and dig me out

 

I told him I don’t care either way, if he doesn’t I will just get someone else to, I have friends

Oh the snide laugh he did at that with a “you have friends huh”

Oh it was right then and there I decided, car in mud or no I was spending the night with someone else

In the end, everything he tried was a larger scale of what I had tried and I told him to just get the neighbor with a tractor

So now…. not only does it lint to the right a bit more

At 80km/hr or higher the steering shakes

So I get to the oil change and I TOLD him my discovery but ya know…

He later tells me that he has to feel for himself the shaking

LIKE I WOULD FUCKING MAKE THIS SHIT UP!

It will probly cost over 1000 to fix the alignment that his half assed project caused

He could have spent that instead when we had the driveway made and put in the small stones

he could have had the guy dig out the spot where hubby wants the shed or a wider area near the wood shed or… fuck, something but no

He was saving money

Saving it for another fuck up

It’s like this all the time

Over the summer he got pissed at me for a couple of days when I told him he does things half assed

Now what I mean by half assed…. A for effort, A for conceptual idea…. but a huge fucking F for follow through

Does that mean I am calling him lazy… no

I know he spends a lot of effort on the things he does… but ya know

He micro manages and doesn’t do things all the way to the end

With the excuse…. “I can’t think of everything”

…. Stupid fucking me for trusting him so blindly and then getting pissy and him making me have a guilt trip over me having the perfect right to be upset

So yeah

Fuck it

I met a guy on alt, had been chatting for a while, he is local and we met for coffee the other day, I spent a good couple of hours with him and loved it

He felt wonderful and treating me as if I have value…. 

I had already been planning to see him again but with the way things went with the mud

I decided to spend the night with him

Made dinner, very nice one for the kids and hubby, had it all ready

Packed an overnight bag with some toys

when it was the right time for me to leave, I had hubby come into the back of the house with me, told him after all the shit of the day I didn’t want to be there, I was leaving for the night and would be back in the afternoon the next day

He said fine and it ended there

I drove off to my friend and had a lovely night

I want a change in my life and I am going to have it

I have value, I have to remember that and demand it and stop following blindly

 

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E.B. Starpointer

erotic author and sex-positive male commentator

An Accident In Space And Time

Just your average, friendly Vulcan

Exposed Loving

Be Love. Bring Love. LOVE.

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